The borg’s coffee sucks, new employee says

December 21, 2005 By

Doug Mahugh wrote up a report on his impressions of his first six weeks working at Microsoft. Says the coffee sucks. Oh, I agree! I’m drinking it right now. It’s drinkable, but that’s about the best you can say. Luckily there’s a Starbucks only a few yards from my office. But, like Doug says in his report, the other stuff makes up for the crappy coffee.

Oh, speaking of which, anyone notice that Microsoft is rarely called “the borg” anymore?

At dinner last night we were talking about just that. That Liz’s friends are telling her that Google is now scarier to them than Microsoft. She told us that AOL forced Google to start putting graphical ads on the search engine. I told her “oh, so they sold their philosophy down the river?”

Hey, Bill and Steve, now is the time to take the philosophy game over. I wrote a post in October of 2004 where I asked “what’s your product’s philosophy?”

Oh, just found this interview with Google’s Marissa Mayer over on Good Experience. She says: “We feel no pressure at all to switch to graphic ads, either internally or from advertisers.” Oh, really? Welcome to AOL!

Hmm, Preston Gralla over at CMP’s Networking Pipeline asks a more direct question: Has Google Become More “Evil” than Microsoft?

That’s not a question for a Microsoft employee to answer. But, if you find our evil, can you please send it back home where it belongs? Thanks! ;-)

The philosophy question is the deeper and more important one, though, or maybe it’s the crappy coffee talking.

Filed Under: Microsoft Office
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  • Christopher Coulter

    Bad coffee and Google one-offs, glad you are able to focus on the important things that are happening.

    No news allowed about Breda Pickering, eh? :)

    Oh one thing you might take note of, Jeff Bewkes becoming TW head soon, which spells certain doom for MFST. But all with the Ian McAllister hints and rumors of some MFST conspiracy with another Tier 1, blah blah blah. And Vista CTP is make or break, if IT is not convinced and just upgrades with hardware, you are looking at a serious serious hit.

    PS – The Windows Live Messenger beta pay for invites and general corruption is beyond crass. Shame.

  • http://www.techmount.com/ amorson

    1. Microsoft is still the borg over the slashdot…

    2. I can’t recollect when Google said they will not have graphical ads. I might be wrong though, Please remind me.

  • http://www.techmount.com amorson

    1. Microsoft is still the borg over the slashdot…

    2. I can’t recollect when Google said they will not have graphical ads. I might be wrong though, Please remind me.

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  • http://tinfinger.blogspot.com/ Paul Montgomery

    Maybe instead of the borg, Microsoft can be likened to King Kong: a huge gorilla that was scary in the past, and just got a makeover in a vain attempt to make it relevant for today. Unfortunately, the only opponents it can win against are dinosaurs. Put half a dozen little biplanes against it and it goes down like a sack of spuds.
    :D

  • http://tinfinger.blogspot.com Paul Montgomery

    Maybe instead of the borg, Microsoft can be likened to King Kong: a huge gorilla that was scary in the past, and just got a makeover in a vain attempt to make it relevant for today. Unfortunately, the only opponents it can win against are dinosaurs. Put half a dozen little biplanes against it and it goes down like a sack of spuds.
    :D

  • Orbit

    oh scoble you make me sick. go collect your Microsoft PR check

  • Orbit

    oh scoble you make me sick. go collect your Microsoft PR check

  • http://www.bynkii.com/ John C. Welch

    The “who’s more evil” argument depends on your definition of evil.

    From an interoperability standpoint, Microsoft is still far more evil.

    However, I know who’s been churning out more useful stuff that benefits more platforms, and it’s not MS.

  • http://www.bynkii.com/ John C. Welch

    The “who’s more evil” argument depends on your definition of evil.

    From an interoperability standpoint, Microsoft is still far more evil.

    However, I know who’s been churning out more useful stuff that benefits more platforms, and it’s not MS.

  • Innocent Bystander

    Dude, Starbucks has crappy coffee too. Did you not have a coffee in Paris while you were there? Any random cafe will have vastly better coffee at about 1/4th the price of Starbucks (which always tastes “burnt” to me).

    Starbucks is to coffee what McDonalds is to hamburgers. I refuse to patronize either.

  • Innocent Bystander

    Dude, Starbucks has crappy coffee too. Did you not have a coffee in Paris while you were there? Any random cafe will have vastly better coffee at about 1/4th the price of Starbucks (which always tastes “burnt” to me).

    Starbucks is to coffee what McDonalds is to hamburgers. I refuse to patronize either.

  • http://www.qumana.com/ Tris Hussey

    Robert you might like this little coffee gadget:
    http://www.liquidplanet.com/Planetary-Design-Desk-Top-Stainless-Steel-French-Press-p-98.html

    I have a version that stores the coffee in the base.

    Perfect cure for bad office coffee.

  • http://www.qumana.com Tris Hussey

    Robert you might like this little coffee gadget:
    http://www.liquidplanet.com/Planetary-Design-Desk-Top-Stainless-Steel-French-Press-p-98.html

    I have a version that stores the coffee in the base.

    Perfect cure for bad office coffee.

  • http://myeastbayagent.com/ Andy Kaufman

    We have Peets at the office and let me tell you that having good coffee is a huge morale booster.

    Sometimes it’s the deciding factor for me when I’m deciding whether to come into the office or work from home.

  • http://myeastbayagent.com Andy Kaufman

    We have Peets at the office and let me tell you that having good coffee is a huge morale booster.

    Sometimes it’s the deciding factor for me when I’m deciding whether to come into the office or work from home.

  • http://www.billbuchan.com/ Wild BIll

    “We’re Microsoft. We have 30 BILLION dollars in the bank. We throw away 12 THOUSAND man years effort (vista reset?). We’re more evil than the rest of the software industry put together. We’re innovators.

    And yet all we can talk about is how shit the coffee is”

    Discuss.

    Conclusion: Microsoft has lost its Mojo, and now its ability to spin silk out of shit. Big style.

    Honestly.

    Scoble. Your just drivelling.

    You’re supposed to be the leading light, The RSS-aware influencer, the geek within the machine – the industry analyst who is turning around this impression that MS is staffed from the neck up with dribbling idiots with no clue and less morals.

    Get with it, else you’ll get a stack ranking of 3.0 and have to HAND OUT the coffee in future. (Woops. was that a Mini-Microsoft reference?)

    Honestly. I come here for the “energiser-bunny-on-speed MS is *fantastic*”, “my wife is a better blogger than me”, “Ohhh! RSS!”, “My our current products suck big time, but look at whats coming next! Dont leave!” and “look who I’m having dinner with – ooooOOOoo!” news, and all we get is shitty coffee stories ?

    Sigh. You just cant get the staff.

    —* Bill
    http://www.billbuchan.com

    P.S. This has been cut down dramatically from its originally sarcastic tone.

  • http://www.billbuchan.com Wild BIll

    “We’re Microsoft. We have 30 BILLION dollars in the bank. We throw away 12 THOUSAND man years effort (vista reset?). We’re more evil than the rest of the software industry put together. We’re innovators.

    And yet all we can talk about is how shit the coffee is”

    Discuss.

    Conclusion: Microsoft has lost its Mojo, and now its ability to spin silk out of shit. Big style.

    Honestly.

    Scoble. Your just drivelling.

    You’re supposed to be the leading light, The RSS-aware influencer, the geek within the machine – the industry analyst who is turning around this impression that MS is staffed from the neck up with dribbling idiots with no clue and less morals.

    Get with it, else you’ll get a stack ranking of 3.0 and have to HAND OUT the coffee in future. (Woops. was that a Mini-Microsoft reference?)

    Honestly. I come here for the “energiser-bunny-on-speed MS is *fantastic*”, “my wife is a better blogger than me”, “Ohhh! RSS!”, “My our current products suck big time, but look at whats coming next! Dont leave!” and “look who I’m having dinner with – ooooOOOoo!” news, and all we get is shitty coffee stories ?

    Sigh. You just cant get the staff.

    —* Bill
    http://www.billbuchan.com

    P.S. This has been cut down dramatically from its originally sarcastic tone.

  • http://scobleizer.wordpress.com/ scobleizer

    Bill, after reading your comment I thought “damn, here’s a guy who probably has a really killer tech blog.” So, I went over and checked it out. What do I find? A post titled “what a fantastic day” where you talk about a nice box of chocolate.

    So, kettle, how does it feel to be black? ;-)

  • http://scobleizer.wordpress.com/ scobleizer

    Bill, after reading your comment I thought “damn, here’s a guy who probably has a really killer tech blog.” So, I went over and checked it out. What do I find? A post titled “what a fantastic day” where you talk about a nice box of chocolate.

    So, kettle, how does it feel to be black? ;-)

  • http://tinfinger.blogspot.com/ Paul Montgomery

    Re Bill’s blog: hah, a Web page written in Notes! How 1997. It even qualifies as uglier than the average Notes-produced page, which is saying something.

  • http://tinfinger.blogspot.com Paul Montgomery

    Re Bill’s blog: hah, a Web page written in Notes! How 1997. It even qualifies as uglier than the average Notes-produced page, which is saying something.

  • http://analystinsight.blogspot.com/ David Rossiter

    In my world (analyst relations) the borg is Gartner!

  • http://analystinsight.blogspot.com David Rossiter

    In my world (analyst relations) the borg is Gartner!

  • http://www.jpstewart.org/cgi-bin/blog/nph-blog.pl?rssid=1135425166 J.P.

    Who cares whether we should or should not talk about coffee. For some it makes the world go around. And when its as bad as it is at work…that makes it worth writing about.

    http://www.jpstewart.org/cgi-bin/blog/nph-blog.pl?rssid=1135425166

    J.P.

  • http://www.jpstewart.org/cgi-bin/blog/nph-blog.pl?rssid=1135425166 J.P.

    Who cares whether we should or should not talk about coffee. For some it makes the world go around. And when its as bad as it is at work…that makes it worth writing about.

    http://www.jpstewart.org/cgi-bin/blog/nph-blog.pl?rssid=1135425166

    J.P.

  • http://www.bladam.com/ Adam

    Hey Scoble,

    I continue to like your blog stuff. If anything, the volume’s a bit much for me to catch up with, but if I want to read about primarily all the technical specifics of different MS stuff, I’ll read some MSDN blogs. I like the semi-randomness of your blog.

    With that said, I think your dig about Google wasn’t quite on the mark. Marissa and others have noted that Google won’t get cluttered with banner ads.

    With that said, I’m still concerned about the Google/AOL alliance for other reasons (many of which have been elucidated by other commentators and commenters), but I’ll remain cautiously optimistic for the time being.

    As for coffee… hmm… I didn’t have any during my recent visit to the Evil Empire, but I noticed that y’all don’t offer any free snacks. Maybe I’ve gotten spoiled from the consulting I’ve done for smaller companies, but shouldn’t MS at least be offering free sugar and protein stuff to keep their coders fueled and happy? Surely the cost-benefit ratio would be favorable? :D

  • http://www.bladam.com/ Adam

    Hey Scoble,

    I continue to like your blog stuff. If anything, the volume’s a bit much for me to catch up with, but if I want to read about primarily all the technical specifics of different MS stuff, I’ll read some MSDN blogs. I like the semi-randomness of your blog.

    With that said, I think your dig about Google wasn’t quite on the mark. Marissa and others have noted that Google won’t get cluttered with banner ads.

    With that said, I’m still concerned about the Google/AOL alliance for other reasons (many of which have been elucidated by other commentators and commenters), but I’ll remain cautiously optimistic for the time being.

    As for coffee… hmm… I didn’t have any during my recent visit to the Evil Empire, but I noticed that y’all don’t offer any free snacks. Maybe I’ve gotten spoiled from the consulting I’ve done for smaller companies, but shouldn’t MS at least be offering free sugar and protein stuff to keep their coders fueled and happy? Surely the cost-benefit ratio would be favorable? :D

  • http://scobleizer.wordpress.com/ scobleizer

    Adam: in a later post I linked to Marissa’s post.

    Free snacks? Oh, that would be cool, but would be guaranteed to help me put on even more weight.

    Over in our offices in Copenhagen they have free candies, though. Yummy!

  • http://scobleizer.wordpress.com/ scobleizer

    Adam: in a later post I linked to Marissa’s post.

    Free snacks? Oh, that would be cool, but would be guaranteed to help me put on even more weight.

    Over in our offices in Copenhagen they have free candies, though. Yummy!

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  • Jude

    This company sucks, The office culture sux and why work for a company that don’t treat their employees right – canadianboy09

  • Jude

    This company sucks, The office culture sux and why work for a company that don’t treat their employees right – canadianboy09

  • Annie

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  • Annie

    KPMG SUCKS especially here in Canada

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