Is your company seeing a bozo explosion?

Guy Kawasaki gives some great advice to those of us who work in companies “how to prevent a bozo explosion.”

#9 got a little close to home. ;-) *

Anyway, one thing that I will always appreciate about Bill Gates is that he lets me walk around Microsoft with a camcorder so I get to study one of the world’s best businesses from inside (how many business school graduates get to do that?).

And, even better, I get to meet a LOT of people from a lot of different businesses, so have collected a few of my own rules about bozo explosions.

There are a few other things I’d add to Guy’s list after studying the problem in detail:

#15: If you are a software developer and if you spend more time in meetings than writing code you might be in a bozo explosion.
#16: If the first question out of your manager’s mouth is “can this be monetized?” you might be in a bozo explosion.
#17: If the name for your product is something like “Contosa Bozo Exploder 2006” you might be in a bozo explosion.
#17B: If your product’s box has 45% more text on it than an iPod box, you might be in a bozo explosion.
#18: If, when an employee comes up with a new idea the answer back is an email with the words “business value” repeated 13 times you might be in a bozo explosion.
#19: If, when you ask a business leader “what’s your philosophy?” and they answer “huh?” well, then, you might be in a bozo explosion.
#20: If more than three people have to be consulted to spend less than $100 million to acquire a company, or build something new, then you might be in a bozo explosion. (Committeeism guarantees slowness, lack of philosophy, and lack of creativity).
#21: If your marketing team can change the spec after the development team has started development, you might be in a bozo explosion. (Or, if your development team doesn’t communicate well, or listen to, the marketing team you might be in a bozo explosion).
#22: If your company forces you to work computers built in 1999, you might be in a bozo explosion (you do realize that having two monitors has been shown by several studies to make people up to 15% more productive, right? Are you working on two or more monitors yet? I keep visiting lots of companies and am suprised to see how many companies force their workers to use small, low-resolution, single monitor setups. They are literally throwing 5% productivity down the drain. For what? A $1,000 per worker savings? It gets worse when we’re talking about software developers who have to wait minutes for their companies’ code to compile (I’ve seen so many horror stories here it isn’t funny).
#23: If your best employees leave you might be in a bozo explosion.
#24: If you’re not allowed to write on your blog that you are in the middle of a bozo explosion you might be in the middle of a bozo explosion (hint: we don’t have such a rule at Microsoft).
But, back to #9. You knew I couldn’t resist, couldn’t you? Well, I personally think that a major company (IE, one with more than 1,000 employees) that only has ONE paid blogger IS potentially a bozo factory. I personally believe every employee should blog. But, then, I’m an edge case.

The asterisk is because my employee review goals show that I’m not paid to “only blog.” I’m facing 197 emails tonight (many of which don’t have anything to do with blogging). Tomorrow I’m going to Danny Sullivan’s Search Engine Strategies conference in New York to speak. And, really, my “day job” is to do videos for Channel 9 anyway. I don’t look at that as blogging. Most of my blogging is done at nights and on weekends, so Microsoft gets blogging mostly for free. Who’s the bozo here? :-)

How can you get out of being in a bozo factory? I’m seeing some best practices:

1) Stop having meetings. Put a 23-year-old in charge and let her ship and get out of her way. At Microsoft that’s Sanaz Ahari (and Scott Isaacs and a few others who are just kicking butt). Or, have a “meeting dictator.” At Amazon Jeff Bezos is famous for coming into meetings and challenging the team who organized the meeting “give me the three reasons why we’re having a meeting.” If they can’t answer, he leaves. Hint: it isn’t good when Jeff Bezos leaves your meeting like that.
2) Have your development team over for Xbox and pizza instead of keeping them locked in their offices during ship nights. I watched Jeff Sandquist do this and his team has done magical stuff in just a few weeks. (You’ll see their work real soon now, it blew me away when I saw it last week. It’s amazing what three developers can do in less than a month).
3) Tell your development team to do something better than the competition. Anything. And then fund it. Expect it. I’ve been watching the Virtual Earth team under Steve Lombardi and have been impressed.
4) Listen to your blog’s commenters, even if it hurts. The IE team hasn’t had the public corner turn yet, but those guys respond to every customer’s request I’ve been getting. Often within minutes (you should see the email I get and pass along). At some point that’s gonna mean they get a killer new feature that you weren’t expecting. I remember one post they had had about 1,000 comments. Or visit the IE wiki. That was started by customers. Not done by a Microsoft employee and it’s watched often by the team.
5) If your team blogs, even when it has no customers, or worse, is derided by the community, you’re on your way off of the bozo explosion. Something interesting happens when you have a conversation with people about what they want. It focuses meetings and gets things going.
6) Get great competitors. Seriously. Stuck in a bozo explosion? Watch what happens when your competitors get rid of their bozos. Everyone notices and that pushes management into action. If they don’t, then you really know you’re on a bozo explosion and that’s a good opportunity to leave.
7) Keep people from changing the spec. A few teams at Microsoft are developing by using scrum (an agile development process where you lock down the requirements for a month and keep people from changing them while you “sprint” to complete that work) and are seeing great results. One manager told me this transformed how they worked and got stuff done.
8) Reward good work. Publicly. With cash. Nothing will get more good people to want to join your team. Nothing.

How do you know you’re in a Bozo explosion? Have you been in a company that successfully has gotten out of it?

70 thoughts on “Is your company seeing a bozo explosion?

  1. Dear sir,

    I am Mr. Damodar Humagain from Kathmandu, Nepal. I have one SNANKE GEM now. I want to seles to my Gem.If your company interest to buy my gem please contact me as soon as possible to include your how much amount you pay my gem?

    Gem Size: 5 grams red colour in locally name is NAGMADI
    Gem Light: above 5.5 ft right and left
    GMP: 98.2%

    Are you interest to buy please contact to my phone and fax or email include your prise.

    My Full Address:-

    MR DAMODAR HUMAGAIN
    P.O.BOX: 15142
    KPC: 162
    KATHMANDU
    NEPAL
    PHONE: 00977-1-5550200
    FAX: 00977-1-5550205
    MOBIL: 00977-9841231581
    E-MAIL: mrdhumagain@gmail.com

    I am wait your possite responce.

    regards,
    Damodar humagain

  2. Dear sir,

    I am Mr. Damodar Humagain from Kathmandu, Nepal. I have one SNANKE GEM now. I want to seles to my Gem.If your company interest to buy my gem please contact me as soon as possible to include your how much amount you pay my gem?

    Gem Size: 5 grams red colour in locally name is NAGMADI
    Gem Light: above 5.5 ft right and left
    GMP: 98.2%

    Are you interest to buy please contact to my phone and fax or email include your prise.

    My Full Address:-

    MR DAMODAR HUMAGAIN
    P.O.BOX: 15142
    KPC: 162
    KATHMANDU
    NEPAL
    PHONE: 00977-1-5550200
    FAX: 00977-1-5550205
    MOBIL: 00977-9841231581
    E-MAIL: mrdhumagain@gmail.com

    I am wait your possite responce.

    regards,
    Damodar humagain

  3. Pingback: The Monster Blog
  4. Pingback: ntschutta.com
  5. Regarding # 19 which reads:

    [quote]
    Scottitude: charmed life? You want to answer my email? I think even you’ve bought into the hype and not the reality of having thousands of readers every day. It’s not always fun. Not to mention that I’ve spent dozens of hours every week for five years to get here. No one remembers that, they just see the artifact of spending all that time and glorifying it.
    [/quote]

    I would most assuredly answer an email…had I received one! And I don’t buy into the hype but I can’t ignore it because it’s everywhere; the “A-List” creates it and those that *do* buy into it, perpetuate it. It’s a vicious cycle.

    I certainly respect the dues you’ve paid but thought it was obvious that my comments weren’t directed toward you, but the elitist mentality in general.

  6. Regarding # 19 which reads:

    [quote]
    Scottitude: charmed life? You want to answer my email? I think even you’ve bought into the hype and not the reality of having thousands of readers every day. It’s not always fun. Not to mention that I’ve spent dozens of hours every week for five years to get here. No one remembers that, they just see the artifact of spending all that time and glorifying it.
    [/quote]

    I would most assuredly answer an email…had I received one! And I don’t buy into the hype but I can’t ignore it because it’s everywhere; the “A-List” creates it and those that *do* buy into it, perpetuate it. It’s a vicious cycle.

    I certainly respect the dues you’ve paid but thought it was obvious that my comments weren’t directed toward you, but the elitist mentality in general.

  7. This is a really timely post… Yesterday, number 16 on the bozo explostion list was:

    #16: If the first question out of your manager’s mouth is “can this be monetized?” you might be in a bozo explosion.

    and today in Google News…

    CFO George Reyes told a Merrill Lynch investor conference that Google needed to find ways to further monetise its business, according to a report in the Wall Street Journal

    Good times!

  8. This is a really timely post… Yesterday, number 16 on the bozo explostion list was:

    #16: If the first question out of your manager’s mouth is “can this be monetized?” you might be in a bozo explosion.

    and today in Google News…

    CFO George Reyes told a Merrill Lynch investor conference that Google needed to find ways to further monetise its business, according to a report in the Wall Street Journal

    Good times!

  9. Nice post Robert, but I have to comment on 8) Reward good work. Cash is very, very nice but there are times when I appreciate and need a ‘Thank you’ a whole lot more.

  10. Nice post Robert, but I have to comment on 8) Reward good work. Cash is very, very nice but there are times when I appreciate and need a ‘Thank you’ a whole lot more.

  11. Scottitue: “If you buy into the existence of the “A-List” and the notion that their words are somehow more valuable than less “famous” bloggers, you are part of the bozo explosion.”

    Apparently some people think their words are more valuable than less “famous” blogger’s words. http://www.scripting.com/2006/02/27.html#whoWeAreYouAndI

    Quote from the above link: “In my world, the reader is an adult who is responsible for what he or she says. I write for a person who is college educated, probably a few semesters of literature.”

    Apparently now you can’t mingle with the A-Listers if you ain’t got none college edoocation. That certainly puts out a _lot_ of famous, intelligent and much more A-List worthy folk out there.

  12. Scottitue: “If you buy into the existence of the “A-List” and the notion that their words are somehow more valuable than less “famous” bloggers, you are part of the bozo explosion.”

    Apparently some people think their words are more valuable than less “famous” blogger’s words. http://www.scripting.com/2006/02/27.html#whoWeAreYouAndI

    Quote from the above link: “In my world, the reader is an adult who is responsible for what he or she says. I write for a person who is college educated, probably a few semesters of literature.”

    Apparently now you can’t mingle with the A-Listers if you ain’t got none college edoocation. That certainly puts out a _lot_ of famous, intelligent and much more A-List worthy folk out there.

  13. I don’t think explosion is the right word, nor is implosion. I think the proper phrase would be “Bozo Creep.” It’s been my experience that these changes usually don’t happen quickly or dramatically. Things slowly creep in this direction, until one day, you look around and everything has changed.

    Companies rarely explode or implode. They die. Slowly.

  14. I don’t think explosion is the right word, nor is implosion. I think the proper phrase would be “Bozo Creep.” It’s been my experience that these changes usually don’t happen quickly or dramatically. Things slowly creep in this direction, until one day, you look around and everything has changed.

    Companies rarely explode or implode. They die. Slowly.

  15. Pingback: mj
  16. Clay Christensen’s book? Man, is that a tired ole line. Doncha have a new techy pick-up line? Yeah I read it, how could I have not, when all Softies worship him as God. But it’s all vague disprutional bubble-making junk, when processes are more adapt, adjust and commodizational. I am guessing you haven’t read Nick Carr’s book then? :)

    I am sorry, no matter how much ‘experience’ a 23 year old has, it’s still not enough. And don’t cull up the random dot.commie or Web 2.0 guys as justification.

    Billions in SALES means little, if it took 5 BILLION to set it up. Now that’s Bozo Xboxistic Accouting. You can take risks sure, but only if on solid ground. If you woulda followed my rules, well, Enronisms, pets.com. kozmo, and Webvan and Global Crossing and Tycoisms woulda never happened either. You can take risks, that’s all apart of capitialism, risk vs. reward, but risk for risk’s sake newfound Web 2.0 style, to sell out or cash-up. Well…obvious where that leads and for every eBay hit you flame up, thousands of others misses and billions in losses.

    talking with someone who has never run a major business but just loves talking about such.

    So you need to be a Fortune 1000 CEO before you can understand basic Economics? Umm ok. Maybe in your 23 year olds as CEOs world, but not in mine.

  17. Clay Christensen’s book? Man, is that a tired ole line. Doncha have a new techy pick-up line? Yeah I read it, how could I have not, when all Softies worship him as God. But it’s all vague disprutional bubble-making junk, when processes are more adapt, adjust and commodizational. I am guessing you haven’t read Nick Carr’s book then? :)

    I am sorry, no matter how much ‘experience’ a 23 year old has, it’s still not enough. And don’t cull up the random dot.commie or Web 2.0 guys as justification.

    Billions in SALES means little, if it took 5 BILLION to set it up. Now that’s Bozo Xboxistic Accouting. You can take risks sure, but only if on solid ground. If you woulda followed my rules, well, Enronisms, pets.com. kozmo, and Webvan and Global Crossing and Tycoisms woulda never happened either. You can take risks, that’s all apart of capitialism, risk vs. reward, but risk for risk’s sake newfound Web 2.0 style, to sell out or cash-up. Well…obvious where that leads and for every eBay hit you flame up, thousands of others misses and billions in losses.

    talking with someone who has never run a major business but just loves talking about such.

    So you need to be a Fortune 1000 CEO before you can understand basic Economics? Umm ok. Maybe in your 23 year olds as CEOs world, but not in mine.

Comments are closed.