I just got off the phone with Larry Page. He's offered me a job to run Google's PR department and I've decided to take him up on it. Why? Because I finally realized that Steve Gillmor is right. Microsoft Office is dead and I wanted to be at the company that is the future of everything.
Larry and Marissa Mayer, who I met at the Google Zeitgeist conference last year, showed me their top secret plans for the future of the software industry and, WOW, are they unbelieveable.
If you loved Google Earth, you'll go crazy when you see what Larry and Sergey have cooked up! Sorry, I've signed an NDA so you'll just have to wait.
Why else did I decide to leave Microsoft? Well, getting 20% of my time back to do whatever I wanted to certainly played a part. Plus, they increased my salary to more than $100,000 and the free food rocks for a fat guy like me!
Anyway, I wanted you to know the news first before anyone else found out.
My first project will be to convert the Scoble Dashboard over to a Linux box.
Also, as part of the deal, I'll be moving to the new Shanghai Google headquarters since Google is moving to China now. My first job as PR guy for the new Chinese-run Google is to ban all uncredible journalists from writing about Google. This might sound a little evil, but it isn't, the world is better off without them. Sergey will announce on Monday that they are redefining evil to mean "whatever Scoble says is evil."
This also means I will add Google ads to all my Web properties and next week I'll switch my Hotmail email address over to a Gmail one. It's going to be a great move for me and my family.
One of my last duties as a Microsoft employee was to upload some videos of Microsoft pranks throughout the years (cool NERD device!).
Oh, one major factor in my decision was Matt Cutts, Google's top blogger. He got me drunk at Danny Sullivan's Search Engine Strategies conference a few weeks ago and got me to leak all of Microsoft's secrets, not to mention he brainwashed me using Steve Ballmer's new brainwashing device (I don't know how he got one of those, but, heck, I guess billionaires can get anything nowadays). Hey, the brainwashing feels good and my allowance went up a few bucks a week.
Matt's pitch to me? "You can work for Bill Gates anytime, but can you work for a company that's gonna make space elevators along with NASA?" Then he showed me the new Google room search prototype and I forgot about all the lame stuff that Bill Gates showed me at lunch last week.
How could I resist a pitch like that?
As part of the deal I'll have to give up my evil and large software company in Second Life. Google will take that over and will replace the blood fountain with a ping-pong table and heat from my lava field will be mined to provide a new source of energy to run its new datacenters.
I'm off to call Steve Ballmer and give him the bad news. I'll ask him to sit down before telling him.
PS: happy ninth blog birthday to Dave Winer's Scripting News.
Update: did you see the Windows Vista news? Maybe I should have stayed at Microsoft!
Update: Oh, one thing that I learned is Google is going to open up Google Video to let you upload as much porn as you want (or, you can charge per viewings of your own video). Of course this video content will be blocked in China.
[...] I’m down for a good April Fool’s joke but so far what I’ve seen has been unconvincing. Scoble and Zawodny moving to Google? Please. Matt Cutts from Google moving to Yahoo? Yawn. The Register reporting China buys Google? I’m glad I unsubbed them last week, they suck even when they are serious. [...]
The only problem you may face is they just hired Wermer to be your boss. Please bring a spreadsheet with your projected returns on Google’s investment on you to the office on Monday morning.
[...] Then I learn that Big in Japan was bought by China and will now be known as Medium in China. Finally, Robert Scoble left Microsoft and is now running the PR department at Google. [...]
Hey, good one!! Looks like you fooled a lot of folks! Robert, you’re too clever.
Hey, good one!! Looks like you fooled a lot of folks! Robert, you’re too clever.
I immediately realized your post was bogus the minute I got there. But I have to confess that seeing Google Geek Blogger in my newsreader totally got me. In fact, I’d just responded to a post about one of your Naked Conversations presentations at another blog, saw the subtitle and thought I’d really gotten confused about who you worked for.
I should have had some coffee since I’m obviously not accessing detailed mental information properly at the moment.
I immediately realized your post was bogus the minute I got there. But I have to confess that seeing Google Geek Blogger in my newsreader totally got me. In fact, I’d just responded to a post about one of your Naked Conversations presentations at another blog, saw the subtitle and thought I’d really gotten confused about who you worked for.
I should have had some coffee since I’m obviously not accessing detailed mental information properly at the moment.
Darn, too bad you’re not staying with Microsoft. Bill Gates just called to hire me as his CEO blogging coach! He insisted I fly out to Seattle first thing Monday… cool, huh?!
Darn, too bad you’re not staying with Microsoft. Bill Gates just called to hire me as his CEO blogging coach! He insisted I fly out to Seattle first thing Monday… cool, huh?!
[...] If it is true, then excuse my “But wait!” question. There are quite a few plausible-sounding announcements being made today… [...]
Nice try. You had me for about 2 seconds.
Nice try. You had me for about 2 seconds.
well, looks like you’ll be learning open office then…
http://www.openoffice.org
well, looks like you’ll be learning open office then…
http://www.openoffice.org
[...] var postURL = “http://amblogger.net/archives/amblogger-comeback-going-pro/”; var postTitle = “AmBlogger Comeback, Going Pro??”; var commentAuthorFieldName = “author”; var commentAuthorLoggedIn = false; var commentFormID =”commentform”; var commentTextFieldName = “comment”; var commentButtonName = “submit”; var cocomment_force = false; [...]
[...] Scoble is leaving Microsoft for Google. [...]
Haha great one!
Haha great one!
[...] Il commençait bien, puis il a tout gâché ! [...]
First the Best Actor Oscar for “Capote,” now a primo job at Google. You’re having a very good year, indeed. If you can manage to kick Brad to the curb and get Angelina, I will worship you as a god.
First the Best Actor Oscar for “Capote,” now a primo job at Google. You’re having a very good year, indeed. If you can manage to kick Brad to the curb and get Angelina, I will worship you as a god.
[...] Scoble joins Google [...]
[...] Robert Scoble también se va a trabajar a Google [...]
[...] Full story at http://scobleizer.wordpress.com/2006/04/01/announcement-im-going-to-google/ Published Saturday, April 01, 2006 1:11 PM by Keith Combs [...]
When you do call Steve… make sure all the chairs are bolted to the floor!
When you do call Steve… make sure all the chairs are bolted to the floor!
The free porn sealed the deal, eh?
Great post!
The free porn sealed the deal, eh?
Great post!
This is very funny Robert. Congrats on fooling a bunch of people!
I’m collecting as many April Fools 2.0′s as I can. Let me know if you see any others.
My post is here:
http://start-up20.blogspot.com/2006/04/april-fools-20.html
This is very funny Robert. Congrats on fooling a bunch of people!
I’m collecting as many April Fools 2.0′s as I can. Let me know if you see any others.
My post is here:
http://start-up20.blogspot.com/2006/04/april-fools-20.html
Nothing new in this April Fools joke: you just expressed your biggest dream: to get hired by Google. I think many people guessed it before.
Nothing new in this April Fools joke: you just expressed your biggest dream: to get hired by Google. I think many people guessed it before.
sadly enough, I didn’t get a laugh out of this, not believable for one word!! you overdid it this time Robert!!
sadly enough, I didn’t get a laugh out of this, not believable for one word!! you overdid it this time Robert!!
well done!
well done!
Hey, now you can fix their corporate blog which you trashed in Naked C’s! Say hi to Jeremy Z who is now blogging over there at the plex … http://mattcutts.com/blog/
Hey, now you can fix their corporate blog which you trashed in Naked C’s! Say hi to Jeremy Z who is now blogging over there at the plex … http://mattcutts.com/blog/
how come china buy google ? not fair
how come china buy google ? not fair
I’d call you a few names but that would be redundant,
The one sad aspect is that I wasn’t for a nanosecond.
I’d call you a few names but that would be redundant,
The one sad aspect is that I wasn’t for a nanosecond.
Now if you were to say that Microsoft was supporting ebooks on multiple platforms, that would be a great April Fool’s joke, i mean, come on, MICROSOFT, supporting READING outside of WINDOWS?
BWAAHAHAHAAHAHAH
Now if you were to say that Microsoft was supporting ebooks on multiple platforms, that would be a great April Fool’s joke, i mean, come on, MICROSOFT, supporting READING outside of WINDOWS?
BWAAHAHAHAAHAHAH
[...] Robert Scoble moving to Google [...]
We will match Google’s offer, we have better pay and more benifits.
http://www.webringr.com
We will match Google’s offer, we have better pay and more benifits.
http://www.webringr.com
Does posting that your biggest dream has actually come true really count as a April fools joke?
Does posting that your biggest dream has actually come true really count as a April fools joke?
[...] Nota: Aunque parezca verdad, esto es una broma publicada por Scoble en su blog en el April Fool o día de los Inocentes… [...]