Disturbing family stories

It's really been great having my mom's sister, Wilhelmina, here this week. She's been going through boxes of my mom's photos and telling us lots of fun stories. The kind every family has in its background.

Last night, however, the stories turned to World War II and the holocaust. I had heard some of these stories before, but I was interested in hearing them again.

As you might know, my mom is German. She was born in 1940 and lived near the Black Forest in southwestern Germany near the Swiss border.

My mom's sister (we call her Purzel, which is a nickname she received from her father who called her "my little Purzelie" — it stands for doing a summersault, she had tumbled and was laughing instead of crying) told us about how her mom (my grandmother) had stood up to the Nazis and had faced scorn from her family. How did she do that?

Well, every German family who had four or more children was given a medal for bearing children for the "fatherland."

My mom's mom publicly denied that medal several times telling officials "I bear my children for God, not for Hitler." Purzel told us that my grandmother even forced the mayor of her town to come to her home and offer the medal to her, and further rebuffed his attempts. By then she had added an economic component onto her denials, pointing to the small pile of coal she, and other families in their communities, had to heat her home and said something like "when you get all of us enough coal to heat our homes then you can come back here and offer that medal to me again."

Now, in today's world that doesn't seem to be very dangerous speech, but then Purzel added some context to the story.

My grandfather was one of the first in his communities to witness the atrocities personally. He told my grandmother that he had seen Jewish people being forced to dig their own graves and then being forced to shoot each other. Long before those stories were officially known.

He was later arrested for speaking out about this in Switzerland (he was released because not every Nazi was a bad Nazi, Purzel told us, and one of the nice ones stood up for my grandfather saying "Mr. Bolanz would never say such things" and released him).

So, telling the mayor of your town (among other officials) to go pound sand was very dangerous and could have caused grave consequences to come down on the family.

Her decision caused a split in the family and in the community that never was healed. Some family members never forgave her for putting them in danger. Community friends never talked with her again after that.

Last night we talked with Purzel about how that experience had changed her outlook (she and my mom were only a few years old during the war, but what happened then has caused deep beliefs in both of them, which today get passed along to the next generations as stories). She is very anti-military. She told when she visited Israel that she wouldn't even go into a military elevator, which astonished her hosts. She also has very little national pride.

She said my grandfather would never speak with her about the war because she said he had been heartbroken. He saw his country do horrible things.

Purzel didn't know I was going to blog these stories. We were just talking as a family. She wanted to make sure we never forgot and was pleading with us to fight against misuse of power, particularly military power, and particularly against minorities.

She can't understand why these kinds of human atrocities still go on even to this day.

Me neither, Purzel, me neither.

  • http://www.speakwithme.com/ Ajay

    Wow. Quite a touching story. That must have been quite an experience. Make sure to keep the memories of your family alive, Robert!

  • http://www.speakwithme.com Ajay

    Wow. Quite a touching story. That must have been quite an experience. Make sure to keep the memories of your family alive, Robert!

  • schmoozer

    Amazing story, we need more people like her to come forward and tell these stories so our future generations never forget.

  • schmoozer

    Amazing story, we need more people like her to come forward and tell these stories so our future generations never forget.

  • Guy Haas

    Curious I am, Robert. What town is your mother from? My father was born in Minseln, near Rheinfelden, on the Swiss border. Later, he moved to Durlach (now a part of Karlsruhe) before coming to the US in 1929.

  • Guy Haas

    Curious I am, Robert. What town is your mother from? My father was born in Minseln, near Rheinfelden, on the Swiss border. Later, he moved to Durlach (now a part of Karlsruhe) before coming to the US in 1929.

  • Anonymouse1

    Robert, the question about why these atrocities go on cuts to the root of the nature of evil, and the capability of humans to be greedy, petty and evil.

    Without going off into a philosophical tangent, I’ll just point out that bad guys do exist in this world, and reflexive anti-militarism does not help: it was military might that finally vanished Hitler, and it is the _lack_ of force today that lets the Janjaweed slaughter thousands in Darfur (to give but one example) …

    Best wishes to you and all your family at this difficult time.

  • Anonymouse1

    Robert, the question about why these atrocities go on cuts to the root of the nature of evil, and the capability of humans to be greedy, petty and evil.

    Without going off into a philosophical tangent, I’ll just point out that bad guys do exist in this world, and reflexive anti-militarism does not help: it was military might that finally vanished Hitler, and it is the _lack_ of force today that lets the Janjaweed slaughter thousands in Darfur (to give but one example) …

    Best wishes to you and all your family at this difficult time.

  • http://www.jazzynupe.net/blog/ RIchard

    That is a very interesting story. I hope you got it on your iPod or something. Stories like those are ones you want to preserve and tell for future generations. What better place than a blog or PodCast… Just a thought…

    I wish I had some of the stories from my grandmother or grandfather. Luckily my Mom’s great aunt is still alive at 102. So need one of those nice shiny new media players and start recording.

  • http://www.jazzynupe.net/blog/ RIchard

    That is a very interesting story. I hope you got it on your iPod or something. Stories like those are ones you want to preserve and tell for future generations. What better place than a blog or PodCast… Just a thought…

    I wish I had some of the stories from my grandmother or grandfather. Luckily my Mom’s great aunt is still alive at 102. So need one of those nice shiny new media players and start recording.

  • http://scobleizer.wordpress.com/ Robert Scoble

    She was born in Alpirsbach. Close to Freudenstadt. They grew up in Weil am Rhein. That’s very close by to where your father was born.

  • http://scobleizer.wordpress.com/ Robert Scoble

    She was born in Alpirsbach. Close to Freudenstadt. They grew up in Weil am Rhein. That’s very close by to where your father was born.

  • http://www.mikespoints.com/ Mike Driehorst

    Very touching and interesting stories. You give a side of WW II and Germany — the potential divisiveness among families — caused by people standing up.

    We definitely should applaud your grandmother and grandfather.
    Mike

  • http://www.mikespoints.com Mike Driehorst

    Very touching and interesting stories. You give a side of WW II and Germany — the potential divisiveness among families — caused by people standing up.

    We definitely should applaud your grandmother and grandfather.
    Mike

  • http://www.singlepoint.ca/ Ron McMahon

    Congratulations on keeping your family history alive!

    Hearing about standing up to bullies in power makes me wonder about the similarities between Germany c 1932 and America now. The burning of the German Parliament in 1933 and the 9/11 attacks. Each event led to a slow, deliberate and methodical march towards restricted freedoms and increasing military action against other nations.

    When have you ever noted someone in person speaking out against mandatory ID presentations at airports, bus stations and other transportation points? The establishment of the Guantanamo ‘gulag’, placing people under permanent detention without recognizing basic human or legal rights. etc. etc. What would YOU do if someone next to you at the airline counter made a bold stand against such ID demands? Sure, this isn’t calling for more coal like your grandmother did, but I doubt that the typical response from others would be any more warm than what you Grandmother experienced from her neighbours.

    ‘Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it.’ – George Santayana (1905)

  • http://www.singlepoint.ca Ron McMahon

    Congratulations on keeping your family history alive!

    Hearing about standing up to bullies in power makes me wonder about the similarities between Germany c 1932 and America now. The burning of the German Parliament in 1933 and the 9/11 attacks. Each event led to a slow, deliberate and methodical march towards restricted freedoms and increasing military action against other nations.

    When have you ever noted someone in person speaking out against mandatory ID presentations at airports, bus stations and other transportation points? The establishment of the Guantanamo ‘gulag’, placing people under permanent detention without recognizing basic human or legal rights. etc. etc. What would YOU do if someone next to you at the airline counter made a bold stand against such ID demands? Sure, this isn’t calling for more coal like your grandmother did, but I doubt that the typical response from others would be any more warm than what you Grandmother experienced from her neighbours.

    ‘Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it.’ – George Santayana (1905)

  • http://familyoralhistory.us/ Susan Kitchens

    Wow. what a story. I hope you got a recording of it!

  • http://familyoralhistory.us/ Susan Kitchens

    Wow. what a story. I hope you got a recording of it!

  • Guy Haas

    Weil is, indeed, not far from Minseln. Grandpa was born in “Basel, Germany” according to my info, not far from the Baseler Bahnhof. I never met Grandpa, but did meet and chat with his brother-in-law, Dad’s uncle, in 1962. We both had to speak Hochdeutsch as something of a foreign language, since he spoke Swiss German. Good luck with gathering family history. I lost both my parents when I was in my early 20s.

  • Guy Haas

    Weil is, indeed, not far from Minseln. Grandpa was born in “Basel, Germany” according to my info, not far from the Baseler Bahnhof. I never met Grandpa, but did meet and chat with his brother-in-law, Dad’s uncle, in 1962. We both had to speak Hochdeutsch as something of a foreign language, since he spoke Swiss German. Good luck with gathering family history. I lost both my parents when I was in my early 20s.

  • http://www.theportermethod.com/blog Doug Porter

    Wow. That is an amazing story. Reminds of some I heard from a close friend’s father. He was German and forced to serve in the army. He said he basically was given two options. To serve in the army and fight or be executed. Horrible time for humanity.

    I recently went to the Holocaust Museum in Washington D.C. If you are out that way, you should check it out.

  • http://www.theportermethod.com/blog Doug Porter

    Wow. That is an amazing story. Reminds of some I heard from a close friend’s father. He was German and forced to serve in the army. He said he basically was given two options. To serve in the army and fight or be executed. Horrible time for humanity.

    I recently went to the Holocaust Museum in Washington D.C. If you are out that way, you should check it out.

  • http://www.ManuelClement.com/ mano

    thank you for posting this Robert. That’s what blogging is all bout IMHO: human stories,current or past. As thousands read this one today, it will also carry on and live a thousand times more.

    Thank you.

  • http://www.ManuelClement.com mano

    thank you for posting this Robert. That’s what blogging is all bout IMHO: human stories,current or past. As thousands read this one today, it will also carry on and live a thousand times more.

    Thank you.

  • http://www.bynkii.com/ John C. Welch

    Ron, the ID issue in Aiports predates 9/11 by a good bit. If nothing else, it was used to help prevent stolen tickets, and given my memories of the furious round of hijackings in the 70s and into the 80s, there was some real need for increased security in specific situations. Requiring ID in specific situations is not unreasonable. Requiring the carrying of ID at all times is.

    WRT Robert’s post, there is a tendency, a temptation if you will to make some rather stupid assumptions about Germany in the Hitler era. The biggest one is that the German people either fully supported Hitler’s actions and motives, or at best, turned a blind eye to it.

    That’s as ridiculous as saying that everyone in this country fully supports Bush and the war in Iraq. There were a lot of people who, in different ways, resisted what the Nazi’s were doing, even if they were members of the Nazi party. Just like not every Democrat is Kerry, or every Republican Bush, not every Nazi was Hitler.

    There’s a movie out now, and the name escapes me, about a young woman who was a member of a German resistance movement during that time, and was executed for it.

    I think that Robert’s story needs to be told, and others like it, not because of any kind of inspirational factors, (although if that’s a side effect, hey, bonus), but because without them we don’t know what really happened. Simple respect for the truth demands that we acknowledge such people like Robert’s grandmother and her actions.

    Otherwise, we shun the truth for the more convenient lie.

  • http://www.bynkii.com/ John C. Welch

    Ron, the ID issue in Aiports predates 9/11 by a good bit. If nothing else, it was used to help prevent stolen tickets, and given my memories of the furious round of hijackings in the 70s and into the 80s, there was some real need for increased security in specific situations. Requiring ID in specific situations is not unreasonable. Requiring the carrying of ID at all times is.

    WRT Robert’s post, there is a tendency, a temptation if you will to make some rather stupid assumptions about Germany in the Hitler era. The biggest one is that the German people either fully supported Hitler’s actions and motives, or at best, turned a blind eye to it.

    That’s as ridiculous as saying that everyone in this country fully supports Bush and the war in Iraq. There were a lot of people who, in different ways, resisted what the Nazi’s were doing, even if they were members of the Nazi party. Just like not every Democrat is Kerry, or every Republican Bush, not every Nazi was Hitler.

    There’s a movie out now, and the name escapes me, about a young woman who was a member of a German resistance movement during that time, and was executed for it.

    I think that Robert’s story needs to be told, and others like it, not because of any kind of inspirational factors, (although if that’s a side effect, hey, bonus), but because without them we don’t know what really happened. Simple respect for the truth demands that we acknowledge such people like Robert’s grandmother and her actions.

    Otherwise, we shun the truth for the more convenient lie.

  • http://www.singlepoint.ca/ Ron McMahon

    John,

    I agree that these stories NEED to be told, and told again and again. That really was the point of my post. BTW – I was scheduled to fly on 9/11 with my wife and 4-year-old son and ID was not required (I live in Canada). The only time I’d ever had ID requested of me was to prove my son’s age (free to fly under 2 years old) and when I flew as a student. Perhaps ID requirements were different in the USA.

    Robert’s Grandmother should stand as an inspiration to us all for her bravery – even though calling for more coal may not seem as risqué from today’s perspective, I believe that it was as much or more difficult for her to do that then as it would be for any of us to challenge the new ‘security’ statutes and other freedom losses that have been implemented in our society since 9/11.

  • http://www.singlepoint.ca Ron McMahon

    John,

    I agree that these stories NEED to be told, and told again and again. That really was the point of my post. BTW – I was scheduled to fly on 9/11 with my wife and 4-year-old son and ID was not required (I live in Canada). The only time I’d ever had ID requested of me was to prove my son’s age (free to fly under 2 years old) and when I flew as a student. Perhaps ID requirements were different in the USA.

    Robert’s Grandmother should stand as an inspiration to us all for her bravery – even though calling for more coal may not seem as risqué from today’s perspective, I believe that it was as much or more difficult for her to do that then as it would be for any of us to challenge the new ‘security’ statutes and other freedom losses that have been implemented in our society since 9/11.

  • Padmanabha

    Thanks for sharing the story Robert. I always wondered whether there were Germans at that time who realized the wrongs that their government was committing and resented it.

    I also appreciate your aunt’s protest against military. I find this video (http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=1422779427989588955) on the topic to be rather educational.

  • Padmanabha

    Thanks for sharing the story Robert. I always wondered whether there were Germans at that time who realized the wrongs that their government was committing and resented it.

    I also appreciate your aunt’s protest against military. I find this video (http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=1422779427989588955) on the topic to be rather educational.

  • http://www.bynkii.com/ John C. Welch

    Ron, your views on this make more sense then. There was a spate of hijackings of US planes in the 70s and 80s that caused the start of the ID requirement.

    I’m not sure of the more difficult part though. Definitely less immediately dangerous. But now, they don’t have to shoot you to make your life suck. They just put you on the right list, and you never fly in the US again. No trains for you. Wanting to drive to TO? Leave early. FBI lists and infiltration of peace demonstrations and groups are rampant, ala the 60s. Piss off the wrong people and even your ability to bank can be messed with relentlessly.

    True, it still beats a bullet in the head, but when you realize the rather unfettered power that a small group of people have to make any form of travel other than automobile effectively impossible, well, a ghetto can be country – sized too you know.

    Kind of the difference between being shot, or being nibbled to death by baby ducks.

  • http://www.bynkii.com/ John C. Welch

    Ron, your views on this make more sense then. There was a spate of hijackings of US planes in the 70s and 80s that caused the start of the ID requirement.

    I’m not sure of the more difficult part though. Definitely less immediately dangerous. But now, they don’t have to shoot you to make your life suck. They just put you on the right list, and you never fly in the US again. No trains for you. Wanting to drive to TO? Leave early. FBI lists and infiltration of peace demonstrations and groups are rampant, ala the 60s. Piss off the wrong people and even your ability to bank can be messed with relentlessly.

    True, it still beats a bullet in the head, but when you realize the rather unfettered power that a small group of people have to make any form of travel other than automobile effectively impossible, well, a ghetto can be country – sized too you know.

    Kind of the difference between being shot, or being nibbled to death by baby ducks.

  • http://www.baubels.net/blog Lars Fischer

    How small the world is. Weil am Rhein is just a few miles away from where I live. It’s located directly before the Swiss border in Germany. On the other side of the border is Basel (where I work).
    BTW Basel is in Switzerland, not in Germany. I always thought that this region of Germany wasn’t too dangerous in WW II. I know a company that moved from Berlin to the town I live (http://www.wehr.de) because of the war – today it’s called Novartis with headquarters in Basel – could even be a Microsoft customer :-)

  • http://www.baubels.net/blog Lars Fischer

    How small the world is. Weil am Rhein is just a few miles away from where I live. It’s located directly before the Swiss border in Germany. On the other side of the border is Basel (where I work).
    BTW Basel is in Switzerland, not in Germany. I always thought that this region of Germany wasn’t too dangerous in WW II. I know a company that moved from Berlin to the town I live (http://www.wehr.de) because of the war – today it’s called Novartis with headquarters in Basel – could even be a Microsoft customer :-)

  • Dave Lincoln

    @John, the film is “Sophie Scholl – Die letzten Tage”, was nominated for but didn’t win the foreign oscar. *Well* worth watching!

    (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0426578/)

  • Dave Lincoln

    @John, the film is “Sophie Scholl – Die letzten Tage”, was nominated for but didn’t win the foreign oscar. *Well* worth watching!

    (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0426578/)

  • Sean DALY

    My mother was born in Normandy in 1941 and among her earliest memories are cowering under the kitchen table while plaster was falling from bomb explosions. The family moved out of the railway town to a quiet little hamlet – a few kilometers behind what became Utah Beach.

    My mother’s family was very fortunate to escape harm, on the night of June 5-6 1944 there were GI paratroopers in the house at 3am, German soldiers at dawn, and American soldiers again at noon. The house next door had grenades thrown into it and burned; fortunately, the occupants had left when the battleships started bombarding the coast that morning.

    60 years later, the effects of that war are still with us. I often think it must be the same for families in all wars…

    Sean DALY.

  • Sean DALY

    My mother was born in Normandy in 1941 and among her earliest memories are cowering under the kitchen table while plaster was falling from bomb explosions. The family moved out of the railway town to a quiet little hamlet – a few kilometers behind what became Utah Beach.

    My mother’s family was very fortunate to escape harm, on the night of June 5-6 1944 there were GI paratroopers in the house at 3am, German soldiers at dawn, and American soldiers again at noon. The house next door had grenades thrown into it and burned; fortunately, the occupants had left when the battleships started bombarding the coast that morning.

    60 years later, the effects of that war are still with us. I often think it must be the same for families in all wars…

    Sean DALY.

  • Guy Haas

    Ja, Lars… I know Basel is in Switzerland, but apparently Grandpa was born in a portion of Basel that was German territory in 1877. Perhaps the Baseler Bahnhof was across the border? Novartis is running radio ads here in the San Francisco area about some of its drug successes.

  • Guy Haas

    Ja, Lars… I know Basel is in Switzerland, but apparently Grandpa was born in a portion of Basel that was German territory in 1877. Perhaps the Baseler Bahnhof was across the border? Novartis is running radio ads here in the San Francisco area about some of its drug successes.

  • http://www.baubels.net/blog Lars Fischer

    Guy maybe you’re right. “Badischer Bahnhof” as it’s called today is a railway station located in Basel Switzerland but is somehow German territory.

  • http://www.baubels.net/blog Lars Fischer

    Guy maybe you’re right. “Badischer Bahnhof” as it’s called today is a railway station located in Basel Switzerland but is somehow German territory.

  • http://scobleizer.wordpress.com/ Robert Scoble

    My mom’s sister says Basel is in Switzerland, but some of Basel is in Germany. They lived on the German side.

  • http://scobleizer.wordpress.com/ Robert Scoble

    My mom’s sister says Basel is in Switzerland, but some of Basel is in Germany. They lived on the German side.

  • http://scobleizer.wordpress.com/ Robert Scoble

    She says that the railway station is still in German territory but that the German territory is very small (about 1 KM).

  • Guy Haas

    Genau, Lars … danke. (I had the adjective wrong.) Borders are dodgy things; there are valleys along the Rhein where the border meanders up a valley to the one side or other for a spell. I blame Napoleon. :-)

  • http://scobleizer.wordpress.com/ Robert Scoble

    She says that the railway station is still in German territory but that the German territory is very small (about 1 KM).

  • Guy Haas

    Genau, Lars … danke. (I had the adjective wrong.) Borders are dodgy things; there are valleys along the Rhein where the border meanders up a valley to the one side or other for a spell. I blame Napoleon. :-)

  • http://kaukasus.blogspot.com/ Hans

    Well, just last week I guided a 83 year old German through Georgia, Caucasus to his place of POW camp in Chiatura, Georgia. Lots of German soldiers tried to reach the territory won by the American forces.

    Paul H. succeded short after May,8th 1945 near Bayrischer Wald and worked even two days as a translator, when the Americans put a couple of thousands POWs on railway and send to Czech territory, where they came into Russian hands.

    The Russians marked pen stripes on the jacket of every soldier: 1 stripe = healthy (to Siberia), 2 stripes = medium health (to Uzbekistan) 3 stripes = bad health (to Georgia)

    Paul added to stripes himself to the 1 he first got and survived his 4 years in Georgia. See photos of his return to Georgia after 60 years here:
    http://kaukasus-reisen.de/paul-haupt.htm

    There are so many tragic and forgotten histories, from this one and yours more or less finished lucky.

  • http://kaukasus.blogspot.com Hans

    Well, just last week I guided a 83 year old German through Georgia, Caucasus to his place of POW camp in Chiatura, Georgia. Lots of German soldiers tried to reach the territory won by the American forces.

    Paul H. succeded short after May,8th 1945 near Bayrischer Wald and worked even two days as a translator, when the Americans put a couple of thousands POWs on railway and send to Czech territory, where they came into Russian hands.

    The Russians marked pen stripes on the jacket of every soldier: 1 stripe = healthy (to Siberia), 2 stripes = medium health (to Uzbekistan) 3 stripes = bad health (to Georgia)

    Paul added to stripes himself to the 1 he first got and survived his 4 years in Georgia. See photos of his return to Georgia after 60 years here:
    http://kaukasus-reisen.de/paul-haupt.htm

    There are so many tragic and forgotten histories, from this one and yours more or less finished lucky.