Do you have the IT blues?

"But, back to the question: how do you get clarity in your life, especially if your head is running 20x normal speed?"

May be clarity is not always needed. May be clarity *is* the realization that you are 20x and that in itself should be enjoyed.

Interesting, too, that Alfred Thompson just blogged about "a general state of malaise" after his exchange with you. A real issue in blogging, for sure: opening up our souls has benefits, and can be helpful, but it also can be dangerous, and leave us open to all kinds of potshots and worse.

Right now I'm reading one blogger who is going through chemotherapy, and another whose mother has pretty severe alzheimer's. I think they both blog because it helps them with their depressions. I know I've had some emotional roller coasters because of things I've written, and there have been times that I wanted to just walk away, and that's from blogging about tech, not intense personal stuff.

So, making a difference, mentioned by both Robert and the anonymous blogger, an important concept. But like most things its a journey and not a destination.

Kip: yeah, this business leaves our emotions on the floor for other people to trample on lots of times.

A guy I know at Freshtopia found out he had a brain tumor. Treatable, thankfully.

At Microsoft a dev committed suicide in one of the garages.

We don't focus enough on this stuff.

As to Alfred, I'm sorry about his situation. I've been there too and it's not fun.

I was the anonymous blogger. Thanks for linking. Hopefully some discussion will be generated that may help others in similar situations (or more selfishly, hopefully I get some good advice or help).

> May be clarity *is* the realization
> that you are 20x and that in itself
> should be enjoyed.

getting enjoyment from an anxiety-ridden racing mind is not something I can grok.

"The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation" - Walden, Henry David Thoreau.

Don't just learn technology alone by reading news, blogs and sites. Be creative in learning. Join local user groups, meetups, and web organizations.

Unlike many similar organizations, our web group don't charge any entry fee. Our sponsor even offers free food and drink during our networking hour. Our sponsor always bring enough food & drink, even coffee and tour after the meetings. We always do crazy things at our meetings. We ask questions and give different things at the end to make sure our guests won't fall asleep.

This week we run our 1st "live" international session with speaker across the oceans. Then we even let the other speaker to talk for 2 hrs. Our speaker enjoyed such interactive and highly engaged audience and many developers were asking practical questions. They told me they didn't come for the food because they can afford to buy dinner. They didn't stay til the end just for the free stuff.

I have a strong feeling that our family of developers and professionals will grow over time. It is my hope that this "thing" will become Silicon Valley version of "Cheers" like the TV comedy series. We just hang around and talk about stuff with speakers and among developers.

You will feel welcome and you want to go where everybody knows your name.

Want to find our who we are and where we meet. Go look for a building called "The Matrix". Follow a local rabbit.

Stop working on your compter 24/7. You will feel better meeting more developers outside work.

"Making your way in the world today takes everything you got
Taking a break from all your worries showing it will help a lot
Wouldn't you like to get away?
Sometimes you want to go where everybody knows your name
And they're always glad you came
You want to be where you can see
Troubles are all the same
You want to go where everybody knows your name
You want to go where people know
People are all the same
You want to go where everybody knows your name."

Go watch FREE TV at http://www.abctv.com. High quality TV Video close to DVD quality. It gives you the entire episode.

Watch Grey's Anatomy. It has sufficient drama to keep you smiling and not thinking too much.

As someone who suffers from clinical depression. my advice is if ur low, get help, see a doctor and get some rest away from stress and work if u can and do something relaxing u enjoy that will keep your mind occupied away from your worries. (Anonymous cause stigma for mental illness is not nice and u can nver run the risk of ur future boss googling ur name at somepoint)

I'm 100% positive that staring at flat images on the screen is what is doing it to everyone. You lose your spatial sense of PRESENCE, and this makes you become detached from everything around you.

My advice would be.. GO OUTDOORS. Walk in a neighborhood or park or something so that you actually move through 3D space that is occupied by something besides walls. You just need to regain your sense of "the world is 3D, and I am in it".

(If you live in a concrete jungle, maybe it is time to consider relocating.)

seshardi: I don't think you really understand his core concerns and motivations. Thinking at 20x speed isn't a problem, it's not being able to enjoy otherwise more simple and 'normal speed' events like a good dinner conversation or sex without feeling disconnected or isolated.
Please consider re-reading the original post and see how focused his concerns are on finding answers when he's both failed and been informed what the ideals are. It's not thinking faster that will solve the problem, it's having the right goals and the support of those around him that will help make the connections that pre-empt a mind from doing 3 things at once because discussing last night's TV would be too boring or something similar. Regardless, everyone enjoys being able to change focus distinctly enough that they actually notice when the come back to an activity/thought, even if they don't know quite when they stopped focusing on it. Again, speed isn't the issue, it's the comfort of change of pace, and connection.

@ Kip: You are correct, it's the journey that matters, and the 1st difference depressed folks are looking for is one that helps them connect.

While I was typing my comments, another poster composed some valid and common insights regarding the dilemmas endemic to a modern life in a 1st world economy (fast pace, impersonal, virtual vs local). If you still have someone to share your space with every night, then you may not know how lucky you are. Some people lose that as family members die or through divorce, etc.

It really can be difficult to attain and maintain connection virtually when mental health throws up roadblocks that make doing so harder than typical. Communication and connection rely on such subtle and nuanced factors that they can be nearly impossible to type if your wires are scrambled.

I would say for every online diary of success in this area, there are dozens of non-posted failures that might have been better for the kind of warmth and feeling that comes from something as simple as a hug or a really good face to face conversation. And obviously it goes from there.

I had a similar issue a few years ago. Some of my bad habits were; 1.) spending too much time sitting in front of a computer, 2.) staying up all hours of the night and 3.) Letting my circumstances hijack my emotions. After taking medication for a short term to stabilize myself I discovered the one thing that was missing from my life. Frequent Exercise! Next week I will be 41 but I feel better now than I did when I was 31. I can actually come up with creative solutions to programs when taking long walks, I'm losing weight and my muscles are less stiff.

I guess nobody has much time any more to just step back for a moment. It's all go go go.

Without getting too maudlin, David Burns' distorted thinking patterns are a great way of keeping your oops, sorry, MY thoughts in order.

Along with that, I think if family happiness is always at the top of the pecking order, you can't go too far wrong - to hell with the cries of, "Platitude!"

Oh, and let's not forget: Not being guilty about just having some plain ol' FUN!

robert u know me as a person who is like the blogger in question

i dont know if i should say this but i do get depressed while i work

a friend of my sister told her that shes seen me doing the same thing for the past 10 years

sitting in front of the pc and typing and wasting time.thats the same puzzle that everyone has

i do see a doc who does treat me although he did blurt out that he is past the treatment stage to just counselling.

sometimes it does good if u do just have a friend u can call and discuss ur worries- no wonder women are intuitive

women are also intutive becos they listen to thier hearts and not with thier minds.

i did make 1 fatal mistake when i listened to my mind when i was in love and that mistake cost me a lot

and by the way

resonet is beta testing some day soon.it could be today or any day

also there is a new sms service in india

its mega @ 6677 - created by me and my dad

send a sms-"mega" everyday to 6677 to recieve motivational quotes and inspirational tips

there is also another app thats users will love to dig and bury- cant commit on whether this will be a vaporware or other

the latest game in town is also here

changing a persons domain name and domainstalking it

Registrant:
Temporarily assigned to Eurobox Ltd.
p.o. box 108
St. Petersburg 197022
RU

Domain Name: A********I.COM

last but not the least

i dont want to beat bill gates -hes retired

my enemy is not man its computers and computer created robots in any form

thats what 1 arun balaji (not me someone else)
will do

and thats whom i will have to beat

if u feel i have not delivered u are right
thats becos i am expecting something to happen and yes its happening the fight tat u fought for fopr tge past 7 ytears is coming tio the enbfd game and either me or someone one else has to say i quitr. what began as a casula chat which then went to i qwill hack u to death and the reply i will chat u top deatrn and cia and fbi and all is dolming tio a end with my fame and anothers i dont know what x and i wosdt ay whats on my mind

my life has been threatened for the past 5 years by people who are invisible and online was infact a mail i had tried to draft to send to u
and this is just in ytime becos a super star is to meeyt his match with subaji and one of them might iotr could dkjie becos of the fwar i fihgt .

is it the suoersatr or is iytn tne polilitician who will win and who will lose i secretky suooport the suopersrae becos he is me and i am him and we are bogh in eachg pther and ui amn kije hgus bew avatra anniyan -stranger man if many faces

thank god its finbally haoppneing and thank hgod the war could end god bless u

i know either a suoper star or suoer oikiclitran will win i hiope somneone dies becos then i coukd end the war ior else trhe ware shall ciontine tro furher datre

i didntr ytoe dies it cane out in its own

bye
arun balaji

"But, back to the question: how do you get clarity in your life, especially if your head is running 20x normal speed?"

Simple: take the time to learn techniques that reduce your wetware's clock speed, find one you enjoy, and practice it regularly.

Meditate. Go to the gym. Do yoga. Go for a hike. Practice pranayama. Hang out with animals. Hook yourself up to a biofeedback unit. Practice tantric sex. There are a thousand different techniques, so you should be able to find one you enjoy. See the work of Dr. Kabat-Zinn (http://www.umassmed.edu/behavmed/faculty/kabat-...) for more details.

I was plagued by chronic anxiety until I realized that running my brain at warp-speed 24/7 was about as productive as running a Pentium IV without a heat sink. It's easy to do in this industry, especially if you're the coding type. Once I started working out regularly and meditating daily, I found myself much happier.

Treat your wetware right and give it the preventative maintenance it needs. You'll not only be happier, you'll be more productive as well.

I've had customers that actually made me depressed because they wanted us to do something unrealistic.

I find the best medicine is to tell those people to go elsewhere. There are plenty of desperate software engineers to take on bad contracts and work.

That's what India, China and South America are for.

So that makes me feel much better.

I saw a report on "how it's made". A show on the Canadian discovery channel about an HDTV factory in China. One of the workers had been there for years, and his dream was to own an HDTV. He had been making them FOR YEARS, but because he was making $4 a day in the factory could not afford one. He said this depressed him.

I believe him with no problem what so ever.

My point being there are plenty of bad corporate and otherwise bossy people to depress you out there. Screw them, no matter if you want the money or not. In the extreme case, go ahead and key their expensive car as well. You'll feel better and your depression will dissipate.

BluezNut,

thanks for the words.

"When I am depressed I turn on HDNet and watch a concert or something."

Slightly careless use of the word "depressed" in the context of this discussion. Depression is a long term condition that isn't fixed by watching a bit of television.

My best advice is to turn the computer off and go outside to you anxious-tec.

My other advice was more for the dude in China feeling the effects of corporate globalization.

If you are glued to your computer or mobile device of any kind due to your success, you are not successful at all. You just think you are.

Andrew is wrong - anyone can be depressed - it is a description of a mood, not only a clinical condition.

My answer, though not a complete one, is to get out, see the world, and pause and take in the views. See http://shannonclark.wordpress.com/2007/04/25/at... for my most recent example of doing just that.

However there is a related issue described by many in the comments (and then easily assumed by others) - for many people in IT/internet-related careers - we spend so much time online, at home, in front of our computers that we may not have the option of "tantric sex" as one person suggested - which I'm sure is stress relieving - but does take two... i.e. there are an awful lot of IT professionals (mostly male but not only) who are single.

Having another person in your life (or a partner + children) while it does come with stresses and complications of its own - also gives perspective and many more opportunities for a mental (and physical) break from our routines.

An important issue without simple answers.

Though the advice a co-worker gave me years ago is good, "occasionally, go take a walk down by the river" - i.e. get away, go outside, walk and relax - and yes, moving water is naturally soothing.

Shannon

You got to slow down the speed of your thoughts. Racing thoughts make you anxious. Anxiety and Depression are connected. Anxiety is when you move too fast, depression is when you do not move fast enough.

If you had software that moved too fast, it would not work properly. Same being true of thy own thoughts. Got to slow them down so your thoughts are grounded and function for peak performance.

Body exists to help you ground thoughts. Body slows down the out of control mind.

@21

"Though the advice a co-worker gave me years ago is good, “occasionally, go take a walk down by the river” - i.e. get away, go outside, walk and relax - and yes, moving water is naturally soothing."

While that's true, if you bring anything mobile, you may get bothered. If you are an IT professional, you are going to get bothered no matter what.
Now a days employers expect you to wear mobile devices at all times, to be available should anything go down.
As if you were a doctor or something.
Set some hard limits. 9-5 is a great one. No calling or mobile outside of 9-5.

That's how it used to be in the 50's and people were much happier.
Somebody tried to get me to deal with an "emergency" this weekend. I told them to wait until Monday. That business hours are over.

That really helps. Some people are scared of their employers or customers though, and those people will be depressed no matter what.

> You got to slow down the speed of
> your thoughts. Racing thoughts make
> you anxious.

Perhaps if I had a way to do that, I would be closer to wellness.. but i dont the way there.

you have to do things that don't let you race.

In my case, it's martial arts and guitar. In St. Louis this weekend for a MA tournament. My son got a medal, I got two, but we had a ton of fun, and all of it was *no* tech.

nice and slow, and thousands of years old.

What would it take for the Infamous Scoble to talk about outsourcing and the emotional effect it has on IT resources in America as your next blog entry...

@James
would love to see that. or opening this topic up to a wider audience somehow.

Some good thoughts... but remember, life is basically a simple thing.

1. If in a rut of anykind, diversify! Change something... anything!

2. Pain - discover what it is - identify what it is that is bothering or hurting you. And remember, if you can't feel pain then your ability to feel pleasure is severely compromised.

3. Pleasure - if your life is missing this valuable component for whatever reason - you better change - and fast.

Figure out what gives you pleasure and raise your dose. If you don't know how then get some help.

Many folks over-complicate life. Don't fall into this trap. Balance out!

One love brothers & sisters!

Hate neo-Luddites. It keeps you energized. ;)

a few books:

The Alexander Technique -walter Carrington, Frank Jones Pierce
Happiness is a choice by Barry Kaufman
Fight Your Fear by Don greene
Feeling Your Fear and Doing It Anyway by S.Jeffers
Yoga
Meditation
the mindful meditation folks... Jon Kabat-Zinn, Thich Nhat Hanh

lots of great ideas out there.. just need to find the one that works for you.. but like RSI for carpal tunnel.. the RSI we don't see as clearly as carpal tunnel is that going like that does cause depressions becuase it blocks out our sense of reality...

Interesting stuff, Robert, never read your blog before today, might not ever read it again honestly, I'm not much of a blog reader, but my sister emailed me today about this blog thing with Kathy and the jerks and wanted to know what I could say to help her not feel so panicked personally... so I did bit of searching around and found out more as well as your blog. Lots of good stuff here. Best of luck.

Your guts know the truth and they tell it every time you ask. Clarity is easy, it is not an achievement, it is just as simple as looking and seeing.